ANDY ARGUIN

Amanda Todd, seen here in her now-viral YouTube plea for help, committed suicide after being tormented online.

I’m sure by now many people are aware of the suicide of Amanda Todd, a British Columbia teen whose Youtube video and subsequent suicide have made headlines across the country. Being convinced to flash a person during an online chat provided a stalker with sufficient material to make her life a personal hell, with circulating photos and video dogging her as she entered her formative teen years.

I think most of the reaction this engenders in us is obvious: sadness over the death of a young woman. Anger towards her peers, who bullied and abused her as she tried to move on. Disgust and contempt for the predator who distributed the material and attempted to use it to blackmail her. That vile person is the villain in the story; they took it upon themselves to destroy a child’s life. When they are (hopefully) caught, our justice system will have an opportunity to make an example of them, and send a message that we will not tolerate such sadistic behavior.

None of it will erase the grief for Todd’s family, and it’s fair to consider them victims in all of this as well.

There you have it, the story and its main characters: Todd, her family, the schoolyard bullies and the revolting pervert who initiated the whole tragic affair.

But after some thinking, I’ve concluded there is another party involved. I can’t help but feel that our culture’s attitude toward naked photos played a larger role in Todd’s death than meets the eye. There is a tremendous stigma attached to sexual content. While most people would be mortified to have naked photos of themselves in circulation, far too many of us take some pleasure, or at least have a sordid interest in them.

I believe most people have probably seen photos or videos of a colleague or acquaintance in compromising positions. It occurs with shocking regularity for young people. I personally have seen several naked photographs of different people I barely know, and my reaction up to this point has been similar in each case: curiosity, followed by bewilderment that someone would be so foolish as to allow the pictures to leak, or even be taken in the first place. After seeing them I move on, but I hold on to that knowledge, and it’s usually one of the first things that comes to mind whenever that person is mentioned.

There is very little upside to taking those pictures, and a tremendous downside. To some people, potential spouses and employers to name a few, they can completely destroy a reputation. It’s the equivalent of making a very bad first impression before being given a real chance to make a good one.

I digress though; the purpose of this article is not to outline the obvious follies of taking nude photographs of oneself, for whatever purpose. I want to cop to my newfound shame for the small role I’ve played in making that content attention-worthy.

My interest in naked pictures of non-celebrities is a drop in the bucket that serves to stigmatize and scorn people who, other than being naïve, have not done anything wrong. I’ll put it this way: the photos are embarrassing because we say they’re embarrassing, and back it up with an active curiosity. If people did not pay attention to nude photographs of people they know, the photos would have very little impact on anyone’s life. When we show interest in them, discuss them amongst ourselves, send them to one another, we passively endorse the people that release them in an attempt to demean others.

I think people have missed a key point in Todd’s case: the amount of power those photos of Todd allowed the monster to wield over her. That is everyone’s fault. The very worst people in society can have a much greater impact than they should if other ordinary citizens allow them to.

People’s lives are filled with mistakes and anguish, but nobody deserves to bear as much as Todd did. Her heartbreaking story lies on the extreme end of what can happen. People will use this as a soapbox to rant about childhood bullying and the hazards of the social aspect of the Internet. When all is said and done, however, the only thing we have control over is ourselves.

It’s too late to do anything in this particular case, but we can all reduce the agony felt by people in Todd’s position. The next time someone sends you a topless photo of an acquaintance, don’t look at it, and definitely don’t let people mock the photo subjects. Stripping such images of their power is a personal choice we can all make: a small, but no less real or unimportant step towards making a vital change.

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Photo: YouTube