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Music to fuck to this Valentine’s day

By in Culture

We’re all familiar with lists of love songs and sexy songs (Al Green, anyone?) coming out around Valentine’s Day. This has been done and done again, but one important sector of love-related music has been undeservedly ignored. I refer, of course, to music you can fuck to.

During February, as the ice outside temporarily thaws and our thoughts turn to love or the drunken hookups week-long school breaks inevitably lead to, it is absolutely essential to have a rock-solid go-to list of music to get down to. And no, there’s no Al Green here. Save that for the love song lists.


by: Yeah Yeah Yeahs

This entire list could easily have been replaced with the track listing for Yeah Yeah Yeahs’ first album Fever to Tell, and album opener “Rich” plays a large role in that by setting the tone. Karen O is one of the craziest, ballsiest, all-around best rock front-women of all time, and her brand of snarly sing-talking, coupled with that instantly recognizable guitar riff, make this song integral for anyone serious about getting down to some quality fucking.

“You’re a Woman, I’m a Machine”

by: Death From Above 1979

One of the most tragically short-lived Canadian bands of all time (until their brief 2011 Coachella reunion), all of DFA79’s catalogue is immensely fuckable. It’s fast, loud and dirty, and really, what else do you need?

“Are You Dead?”

by: Father Figures

Father Figures is a guitar-and-drums duo, much like the bass-drum combo that is DFA79, and the music is a suitable complement. While DFA79 is fast and overpowering, Father Figures provide a mellower but still totally bone-worthy alternative. They get bonus points for being the only local band to make this list.


by: Kings of Leon

This song is very much in the vein of “You’re a Woman, I’m a Machine.” It’s dark and loud in a way that most Kings of Leon songs aren’t, and the result is a much more overtly sexy song than most of their old-school folk-rock-y ditties.

“What You Need”

by: The Weeknd

No list of this nature would be complete without sexy music wunderkind The Weeknd, who released a remarkable three albums in 2011, all of which were spectacular. But for my money, it doesn’t get much better than “What You Need,” a smooth jam of the highest order. I have never been so tempted to cheat, and I don’t even have someone to cheat on.

Images: Supplied

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