ANDY ARGUIN
Sports Writer

On the verge of Super Bowl XLV it’s sad to think there are only three more football games this season.

As for whether this is the last NFL game to be played in a while due to a lockout is to be determined, but things currently look dismal. Join me in savouring the last few games of the season, won’t you?

Unfortunately, three of the remaining four teams are extremely difficult to cheer for.

Let’s start in the AFC where the Jets travel to Pennsylvania to play the Steelers. I think we can all agree that if both of these teams could be wiped out by their planes colliding mid-flight, the world would be a better place.

The Jets join the Islanders, Nets and Mets as the reject little brothers of the Rangers, Knicks and Yankees. Anyone in New York with class cheers for the Giants, with the Jets appealing to a questionable demographic.

Jets’ quarterback, Mark Sanchez, is a dirtbag who can’t make throws outside the numbers and the running back LaDanian Tomlinson is a whiney asshole. Head coach Rex Ryan’s obnoxiousness is entertaining, but he is reminiscent of the fat, drunk uncle who shows up at Thanksgiving and makes vulgar comments about his 16- year-old niece.

This doesn’t mean I will be cheering for the Steelers. They’ve won six titles, two in the last decade, making them the NFL team with the most Super Bowl victories. It’s never good when one team has that honour, as it serves to give their fans an undue sense of superiority over all other teams. A Steelers Super Bowl win this February will only make them bolder.

Fun fact: the average Steelers fan weighs more than the average Steelers linebacker. Their quarterback Ben Roethlisberger is a sexual deviant who has been accused many times of treating women with a lack of respect.

The situation in the NFC is not much better. The Chicago Bears disgust me and reached the playoffs on the back of fluky regular season wins. Does anyone truly believe they are one of the four best teams in the league? Fuck and no. They lucked out drawing the disgraceful Seattle Seahawks in their playoff game and now they are a win away from ruining the Super Bowl by getting murdered by the AFC champion. Jay Cutler is a petulant dick and anyone with a soul should hope he doesn’t win a Super Bowl.

The Green Bay Packers are where the smart man puts his allegiance. They are likeable and exciting and the worst thing about them is by far their legion of white linebackers with greasy long hair.

Green Bay deserves to win the Super Bowl after being decimated by injuries this season. Plus, if the Packers prevail, that would really stick it to Brett Favre. That would be delightful. I predict a Packers-Steelers Super Bowl.