Sex toys can be intimidating to the uninitiated — I can speak from experience. However, by consulting experts and browsing stores, I’ve learned that shopping for sex toys doesn’t need to be scary.
I wanted to learn the ins and outs of shopping for sex toys, but I had two primary questions. What’s a good place for beginners, and how do you shop on a student budget?
Michaela Madraga is a former employee at the Saskatoon store Positive Passions, a sex toy enthusiast and fourth-year psychology major at the University of Saskatchewan. She specializes in the field of sex psychology and understands that overcoming stigma and misconceptions is important when deciding to shop for sex toys.
“With sex toys, it’s almost like it’s replacing a partner. People have a weird thing with that, as though ‘Oh my God, if you use a vibrator then you’re not going to get off with a partner,’” Madraga said. “This is a completely separate part of your sexuality and it can be intertwined with your partner stuff, but it doesn’t have to be and it doesn’t make you any less devoted.”
With this assurance in mind, I did some undercover snooping at Saskatoon’s Lil’ Devil Adult Store to see what shopping for sex toys is like and to get an idea of what’s out there.
It turns out people love sex toys! I expected the store to be totally empty, but it was bustling.
When it came to the products, I was blown away by the variety. Colours, textures, not to mention sizes — it was pretty overwhelming. Let’s just say there aren’t many experiences as humbling as coming face-to-face with an 18-inch dildo.
Luckily, when it comes down to finding a good starting point for beginners, Madraga has lots of advice. If it’s battery operated, go multi-speed.
“I would recommend, for your first toy, getting something that is multi-speed because one speed isn’t really ever going to get anybody off,” Madraga said.
For hygienic reasons, she also suggests buying products made of non-porous materials such as plastic, metal, glass or even cured wood.
“For porous products, you can never completely sterilize them ever. I use non-porous items only, because I’m kind of a diva,” Madraga said.
While this helps to narrow down your options, it should hardly impede your choices as there’s still plenty of variety within the realm of those materials.
For $18.95, you can get a Hustler’s Taboo brand 7-inch metal dildo at Lil’ Devil. However, while the dildo is undoubtedly the cornerstone of the sex toy industry, Madraga suggests that beginners may want to start with something a little more remedial.
“The least intimidating thing for vagina people would be just a small bullet,” Madraga said, referring to small vibrating stimulators.
They are discreet, and also a good option if you’re shopping on a budget. At Lil’ Devil, the multi-speed Doc Johnson Silver Bullet retails for $19.95, so you won’t spend an arm and a leg to get between your thighs.
For penis people, your options for beginner sex toys are narrower, especially if you’re not into putting stuff in your butt.
“There’s a lot more in terms of anal toys for men, or people in general — everybody’s got a butt hole,” Madraga said.
If that’s something you’re interested in, the Doc Johnson small butt plug goes for $16.95 at Lil’ Devil. It didn’t look very small to me, but that’s a debate for another day.
I came to realize that, other than anal toys, male sex toys are mostly just variations of things to stick your dick in — not that I’m really complaining.
The most intriguing item of this ilk at Lil’ Devil was the Penthouse Pop-a-Pussy. For $29.95, you can own a portable synthetic vagina molded after a porn star of your choosing. Unfortunately, they come with the aforementioned sanitizing issues of non-porous toys, so be sure not to share.
If you’re thinking about trying out sex toys, there’s no need to be intimidated. It’s all about finding the right ones to learn with — everyone has to start somewhere.
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Image: Jeremy Britz / Graphics Editor