Wholesome, non judgemental, and educational advice on everyday problems.
Dear Jaclyn,
I see a lot of people on Tiktok talking very openly about their mental illnesses. While I do appreciate their openness and willingness to share, it makes me uncomfortable because I’ve started to identify with them a lot and I’m worried that maybe I should see someone about how I’m feeling. I’m not sure if I’ve just “confirmation biased” my way into believing that this is the case, but I need clarity and I’m scared to talk to my friends about it because I’m worried they won’t take it seriously. Same thing with my parents. They don’t believe in therapy at all and I’m stuck living with them so I don’t know where to go with this.
Sincerely,
Concerned for my mental health
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Dear Concerned for my mental health,
First and foremost, if you, or anyone for that matter, feels concerned for their mental health, do not wait to find help. Regardless of whether you feel like you’ve “confirmation biased” yourself, you’ve resonated with the content about mental health, and that realization is important. You know yourself better than anyone, and if how you’ve been feeling lately is concerning, then please find a professional to talk to.
It is understandable that speaking about your mental health makes you uncomfortable, especially when you’ve grown up with parents and friends who you feel may not take mental health and mental illness seriously.
Some may feel uncomfortable because society has constructed such taboo and complex ideas around mental health. We are so fortunate to be living in a time where mental health is advocated and taken more seriously.
It is okay that you are scared to talk to your friends and family about it because you are worried about how they will react. I cannot speak to the kind of relationships you have with them, but if they care about you, it is important to let them know how you are feeling.
If you still cannot bring yourself to talk with them about it, then start with talking to a counsellor or therapist. Sometimes it is easier to talk to a complete stranger than those closest to you.
USask has a whole array of mental health services. Try this address as a start:
https://students.usask.ca/health/healthy-mind.php#Stress
They have services for stress, anxiety, depression, relationships, self-image, grief, and culture shock.
Once you have found some answers about your mental health concerns, you may choose to open up to your parents and friends about it. It is important to include them in your concerns because family and friends are usually our first system of support.
The poet and philosopher, Henry David Thoreau once said, “Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves.”
Dear Jaclyn,
I’m an alumni from the U of S but I still read the Sheaf, haha. Ever since I graduated from the university, I’ve been working at what I thought was my “dream job”. I spent so many years and poured in some blood, sweat, and tears to get here. However, now that I’m here it’s just… awful. The people here are so overbearing and intense, the job is incredibly demanding, I spend so much of my own hours doing unpaid overtime because that’s “the name of the game”. It’s not bad all the time, but enough that I’m going home everyday with the same words repeating in my head: “I need to quit my job”.
Is it the long winter? Am I being petty? I haven’t even moved out of my parent’s place yet and I desperately need to (for personal reasons). How am I supposed to jump careers? In this economy?
Sincerely,
Needs to move on
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Dear Needs to move on,
I was exactly where you are about three years ago. I graduated with my B.Sc in Biochemistry and Biotechnology and started working for a pharmaceutical company – I was ecstatic and eager to work in my field. Flash forward three years later, and I was miserable; the typical overworked and underpaid. I was even trained in three different departments, so it wasn’t like I couldn’t mix things up. But I was feeling exactly how you feel at the end of each work day: “I need to quit my job.”
So what did I do? I literally made a pros and cons list comparing my current job, and any other prospective jobs I found on the internet. Turns out, doing so didn’t enlighten anything because the pros and cons were even. I was gutted – absolutely devastated that I was “trapped” at this job that I hated.
I compromised and talked with management, and asked if I could work part-time instead of my salaried, full-time contract. I needed to take a step back in order to figure out what I wanted to do. Thankfully, the company allowed me to change my contract, and with my reduced hours I was able to do some thinking and research. I looked up so many other career prospects, opportunities to learn new skills and possibly further my education. Eventually, I found out I only needed six more classes to turn my minor in Psychology into a B.A.
I did end up quitting my job and I felt liberated. However, I’m definitely not advocating for you to quit your job if you don’t have the financial capability to do so. That’s a whole other thing I had to figure out, but in my case, I’m glad I did.
I’m in my final semester of my B.A. and it turns out I love psychology and I’m excited at the job prospects it allows me. This being said, I’m not suggesting that you go back to university. Rather, just take time to explore other options and alternatives.
Let me be a not-so-cautionary tale – it’s never too late to change paths and try something new.