Top 5 notable outcomes of the federal election
By The Sheaf   —   October 24, 2015   —   in
Distractions
1. Stephen Harper’s rock band, the Van Cats, will be performing at Louis’ Pub next month.
2. Hot off the campaign trail, Marijuana Party leader Blair Longley can now finish painting that wizard on the side of his van.
3. The Green Party managed to keep their one seat in the House of Commons. It was projected that they had won two seats, but Elizabeth May had just passed out in one of them.
4. When he moves back to his childhood home of 24 Sussex Drive, Justin Trudeau can reclaim the bag of pot he forgot in his sock drawer.
5. While head of state may not be in Tom Mulcair’s future, he can always settle for his rightful destiny as the heir of Slytherin.
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