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What’s white and creamy and streaming down your chin? Eggnog!

By in Culture

Okay, I admit it: I failed. This article was intended to be a review of the commercial eggnog brands. I made it through two before “tapping out,” as the cool kids say.

Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing I love more than a thick, creamy glass of nog. Heck, my dad used to call it “Greg-nog.” But at 300 to 400 calories a glass, it tends to fill the belly.

I made it through Lucerne Holiday Eggnog and Safeway Select Gourmet Rich and Creamy — with strong nutmeg overtones and a well-rounded body, Lucerne was the clear champion; if you were wondering — but I couldn’t get any further as the difficulties of the task truly dawned on me. Oh how times have changed; I was once able to guzzle nog like water.

Oh how times have changed; I was once able to guzzle nog like water.

In yesteryear, I would sit down with my chocolate advent calendar and eat down the days until nog appeared on grocery store shelves. Peering behind rows of Sunny D and cartons of half-and-half, I’d begin my investigations in early November, desperately searching for the elusive Christmas nectar. When finally acquired, a carton of nog presented no more than a mere afternoon’s delight. Oh if t’were only still so! Alas, who knows where the time goes?

Yet, though I am no longer up to the task of sampling the city’s nog offerings, my passion for — and enjoyment of — nog will not be shaken. And so I offer this article as a tribute to nog in all its forms — nog ice-cream, nog latte, nog and rum, home-made nog”¦ummm”¦nog milkshake”¦ and all the rest.

Eggnog is that rare drink which successfully combines the flavours of cinnamon, nutmeg, rum, raw egg and sugar. It is seasonal (and thus exotic) and combines well with booze — usually rum but, at least in the wacky U.S. of A, sometimes bourbon. If you can think of a better milk-based drink, name it. I guarantee it pales in comparison with nog.

This Christmas when you’re leaving out a little snack plate for Santa, don’t forget the nog. Carrots are fine for reindeer, but a swarthy glass of nog is a far better match for a fat magician on a wild all-night ride across the world. In excelsis Deo! Nog is here.

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image: Flickr

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